The other night, Gina and I went to a nice restaurant in the
greater Birmingham area. We met there,
for we were coming from different places.
I arrived first, was greeted by the host and taken to our table. The waitress came quickly to welcome me and
ask if she could get me something to drink while I waited. But that was the end of the quickly.
A couple was sitting in the same area that the waitress
knew. The rest of the night, we were
waiting on her. The people she knew
became her priority, not us. When we
finished, we waited several minutes as she stood at her friends’ table talking,
trying to get her attention so we could get our check and pay our bill. If that had been my first time there, I
probably would not have been impressed enough to come back. You see, the quality of the meal is only part
of the restaurant experience. The whole
experience plays a part in whether or not we will return.
As I have reflected on that experience, I remembered an
article Dan Reiland wrote on connection.
He used a similar experience to illustrate the importance of hospitality
when the Church gathers. He wrote; “This idea of connection is the same in your church. Whether
you are part of a chain, or a mom and pop café, or an independent, people want
to connect with your experience or they're not coming back. And keep in mind, it's not all about the meal
(sermon), it's the whole experience.”
Dan then raised the question,
“Connection on whose terms?” Here is how
he responded:
I think it's best to set the
connection to the environment on their (the guests’) terms and set the
connection to the church mission on your (church leaders’) terms. It's often
done just the opposite in many churches.
Here's what I mean. When you set the connection based on the new person's
experience, you set the environment to make them feel at home. So we make the
space itself feel good, we have a Coffee Shop for the fancy stuff, and free
coffee stations too, the aroma is important. The dress is casual, we don't make
visitors stand, we don't make them were a name tag that says "Hey
everybody, look at me, I'm new, I don't belong here." They don't have to
do anything, say anything, or commit to anything to come to church. Those are
the terms new people love when trying a church. And like a restaurant, they
know real fast if they like it or not.
In churches where the environment is set on the church leaders' terms, the
guest is required to embrace any number of things such as dressing a certain
way, wear a name badge, sit in a special section, stand up, go to a room,
accept a visit, meet the pastor after the service, and the list goes on. All
these things can be good, but keep in mind one crucial issue, your guest might
not want to!
You’ve
probably heard the expression, “First Impressions Matter.” Many point out that guest begin to form their
first impressions when the pull on the church campus. Have the church members taken all the good
parking spaces? Last Sunday I watched a
church family park in a parking space marked for visitors and most of the
parking around the Family Ministry Building was taken by those of us who are
here to serve. What kind of first
impressions does that make for a young family with children, who have to park
in the upper parking lot and find their way first to the place of worship and
then to the nursery?
And
when persons enter the building, are we there welcoming them or have we huddled
in our little groups? The same could be
asked of Sunday school classes. I was
talking to a person recently who had visited one of the larger Sunday school
classes. He said no one spoke to them (he
and his wife) when they visited the class.
I
regularly hear persons talk about the friendliness of Gardendale-Mt.
Vernon. Apparently we do make some
pretty good first impressions. The
restaurant I ate at generally does. But
that night, the waitress’ focus was somewhere else. It reminded me how important it is for us to
be very intentional Sunday after Sunday, Wednesday after Wednesday. When we don’t put our best foot forward, a
person may not get connected.
As always, your responses to these
Reflections are welcome. You can
email me at rguess@gmvumc.org.
greater Birmingham area. We met there,
for we were coming from different places.
I arrived first, was greeted by the host and taken to our table. The waitress came quickly to welcome me and
ask if she could get me something to drink while I waited. But that was the end of the quickly.
A couple was sitting in the same area that the waitress
knew. The rest of the night, we were
waiting on her. The people she knew
became her priority, not us. When we
finished, we waited several minutes as she stood at her friends’ table talking,
trying to get her attention so we could get our check and pay our bill. If that had been my first time there, I
probably would not have been impressed enough to come back. You see, the quality of the meal is only part
of the restaurant experience. The whole
experience plays a part in whether or not we will return.
As I have reflected on that experience, I remembered an
article Dan Reiland wrote on connection.
He used a similar experience to illustrate the importance of hospitality
when the Church gathers. He wrote; “This idea of connection is the same in your church. Whether
you are part of a chain, or a mom and pop café, or an independent, people want
to connect with your experience or they're not coming back. And keep in mind, it's not all about the meal
(sermon), it's the whole experience.”
Dan then raised the question,
“Connection on whose terms?” Here is how
he responded:
I think it's best to set the
connection to the environment on their (the guests’) terms and set the
connection to the church mission on your (church leaders’) terms. It's often
done just the opposite in many churches.
Here's what I mean. When you set the connection based on the new person's
experience, you set the environment to make them feel at home. So we make the
space itself feel good, we have a Coffee Shop for the fancy stuff, and free
coffee stations too, the aroma is important. The dress is casual, we don't make
visitors stand, we don't make them were a name tag that says "Hey
everybody, look at me, I'm new, I don't belong here." They don't have to
do anything, say anything, or commit to anything to come to church. Those are
the terms new people love when trying a church. And like a restaurant, they
know real fast if they like it or not.
In churches where the environment is set on the church leaders' terms, the
guest is required to embrace any number of things such as dressing a certain
way, wear a name badge, sit in a special section, stand up, go to a room,
accept a visit, meet the pastor after the service, and the list goes on. All
these things can be good, but keep in mind one crucial issue, your guest might
not want to!
You’ve
probably heard the expression, “First Impressions Matter.” Many point out that guest begin to form their
first impressions when the pull on the church campus. Have the church members taken all the good
parking spaces? Last Sunday I watched a
church family park in a parking space marked for visitors and most of the
parking around the Family Ministry Building was taken by those of us who are
here to serve. What kind of first
impressions does that make for a young family with children, who have to park
in the upper parking lot and find their way first to the place of worship and
then to the nursery?
And
when persons enter the building, are we there welcoming them or have we huddled
in our little groups? The same could be
asked of Sunday school classes. I was
talking to a person recently who had visited one of the larger Sunday school
classes. He said no one spoke to them (he
and his wife) when they visited the class.
I
regularly hear persons talk about the friendliness of Gardendale-Mt.
Vernon. Apparently we do make some
pretty good first impressions. The
restaurant I ate at generally does. But
that night, the waitress’ focus was somewhere else. It reminded me how important it is for us to
be very intentional Sunday after Sunday, Wednesday after Wednesday. When we don’t put our best foot forward, a
person may not get connected.
As always, your responses to these
Reflections are welcome. You can
email me at rguess@gmvumc.org.
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